Day 40 - families

So, day 40. The last day of Lent. It always seems like a bit of an anticlimax! Advent leads up to Christmas Day and the last 'star' we leave is always for Christmas Day - whereas the last heart is definitely only on Easter Saturday, not Easter Day.

So, today's also a cheat. A last minute heart on a bus stop near the in-laws. And the Easter Day heart hung on the Easter tree for the table. 

It's been good to visit family - to see people we haven't seen for a while, to catch up with how tall the kids have got, how they're doing with revision, which new directions the adults are taking (my life always seems a little boring at this point!), and which kids have overtaken them in some respect.

A shame not to get more time chatting with O and I - she's still struggling with the loss of her dad and the complications with her mum. And nice to spend a bit of time with C and M who are exploring fostering which is super impressive and exciting. They'll be great and be able to provide a family along the journey for kids who don't have one. H looked fed up with his revision already, which is not surprising as he's been working hard so far and S is always full of new and exciting plans, aiming high and knowing she starts from a secure family base. All good. Thanks God. 

Day 39 - flowers

Beautiful flowers for a back drop of Good Friday today at The Courts, National Trust garden in Holt, Wiltshire. I was particularly excited about the swathes of tulips (though sadly, and surprisingly none of the flouncy 'parrot' variety) and Neil was slathering at the asparagus beds. 

All the calm beauty was slightly interrupted with a phone call from a number I didn't recognise asking about EAPPI. I was a bit caught off guard - as the calls from the 'emergency' phone, which I am responsible for this weekend redirect without any indication that that's where they're coming from. But a poor dad was worried about his daughter having heard reports about a 23yr old British woman having been killed near the Old City in Jerusalem. Thankfully a quick call to a colleague in our Jerusalem office confirmed that all our volunteers are OK, and by the time I was able to call him back to tell him that Lottie had already been in touch with him. But of course it's horrible news and devastating for her family and friends. From news reports it appears to have been a man with serious mental health problems, so I'm rather hoping that it's not the start of something more sinister over the Passover and Easter celebrations. Insh'allah. 

Day 38 - neighbourhoods

Finally leaving a heart in the 'hood. Feels like it's been a while. One or two earlier on in Lent, but often finding that I was leaving them outside our immediate locality, or out of Hackney altogether. This is in direct contrast to those Advent signs which we only leave on Chatsworth Road. So it was good to leave one there today. Though the builders working on the empty shop next to Chatsworth Supermarket seemed a bit nonplussed by it all.

I read in the Hackney Citizen - which I do quite like even though it feels about the most incongruous paper ever - that the Coop is opening a store on Chatsworth Road, and though there had been a lot of local resistance to a Tesco metro on the same site, the landlord was hoping there'd be more support for a Coop. I'm in two minds. I'd probably use a Coop for 'small shops' and to be honest I usually head to Sainsburys on the Lower Clapton Rd for this - so the local shops wouldn't be really missing out, but I use Chats Supermarket so much for this and that, one or two things we need immediately, and I do wonder if I'd be loyal if there was a Coop in walking distance. To be honest I probably would be - my use of Chats Supermarket is mostly to do with my laziness, as it's absolutely the nearest shop to our front door, and unless the Coop is taking over the Creperie premises it's likely to remain so. But it is a dilemma. It would be a shame for local shops to feel they're pushed out because of its arrival, but with the increasing 'boutique' feel on the Road perhaps there are not that many shops it would be in direct competition with, especially as the Spar and Homerton Express have already arrived as larger grocery stores?

I've often wanted to do 'more' in the local community - ideas of interfaith groups and street parties have floated around in my head for years. I'm held back by not being the sort to 'make things happen' - I'd rather tag along supporting others. But increasingly I feel these are things which I need to get off my arse for otherwise they are always going to be the ones that got away. Anyone up for a new adventure?

Day 37 - the NHS

So, the NHS. National treasure. Needs to be fought for. I have often left a Lenten heart somewhere near here - the back of Homerton Hospital where the phalanx of bikes lines the blossom avenue which gives garden refuge to those recovering, supporting, working. When I walked through recently I realised I hadn't left a 2017 heart here. So, this is rectified today. And connects with yesterday.

Because really the reason the two families agreed to have their story told so publicly is because they both want to challenge others to sign the organ donor register. At present Wales is the only nation in the UK with an 'opt out' register.  This means that if you die elsewhere in the UK your organs can only be used if you've signed the organ donor register or if your family agree to it after your death. Campaigners are calling for all in the UK to be assumed to be opting in to donating their organs, unless they opt out (as in Wales). This would massively increase the amount of organs available for transplant and mean less people die for the want of a donated organ. 

As Sue says to Cole when she first met him: If it was your sister, son, mum who needed a transplant, wouldn't you want them to have it? And if so, why would you want to deny others that same thing?

Transplants are one of the most complex, difficult and expensive procedures the NHS does. The UK is a world leader. I am in awe of those working in it in whatever capacity and dearly wish successive governments would stop slashing it up and selling it off.  And while we wait for the law to be changed, I have been challenged to think about organ donation, and to think about signing that register. 

Day 36 - Linda and Sue. The mums.

I made these hearts especially. At half past midnight last night. I knew I was going to meet - or at least be in the same room as - two women who'd both lost their sons. Who share a deep bond due to the fact that one, Sue, had made the tough decision to give away the organs of her dead 15 year old boy, and that one, Linda, had seen her 15  year old boy live because of it.

I got all teary every time I thought about their story, which our good friend Cole has told so eloquently through a radio play and a newly published book: The Boy Who Gave His Heart Away. We were going to join him for his book launch at Waterstones in Trafalgar Square and I knew The Mums would be there.

I wanted to make them a heart each. I flustered between wanting to make it beautiful, but then feeling like the 'recycled' odd shaped, and slightly vulnerable, ones would be better. More appropriate. But as I thought about it I felt it would be better with the 'shiny' ones... a symbol of those hearts loved and given and lost - no longer frail and useless, perhaps, but symbolising forever a courageous gift, a beautiful thing, a lasting and precious bond of friendship between two women. Two mums. Two grieving mums.

I felt silly giving it to Sue, really. Didn't want to draw attention to myself, felt small in the shadow of her humility 'We're just ordinary people. Just normal mums'. Yes! That's why I want to honour you in such a small way - you're just like me. Normal mums who would have done anything to save their sons. And the rest of us never know if we will ever have to walk their road. We have to savour it all while we can. Linda's grief is rawer, with her boy only just gone these last 6 months. Though of course Sue had to relieve all her grief again as her boy's heart died then too. So I just caught her as she was out of the door, and mumbled that Sue would have to explain why I gave them both a slightly childish looking crafty heart. She hugged me graciously anyway. Perhaps grateful for the kindness and care of strangers? I hope so.

I hope tonight was in some way a good part of their hard journey. I'm sure it was hard. But perhaps in the telling of the stories of these two sons they will find their memory is honoured. Neil told me later that Cole gave both families total veto on what he wrote. Good job Cole. 

Day 35 - Quakers

First day back at work following the bruising meetings in Geneva. The temperature reached a staggering 25 degrees yesterday in London. It was a little cooler today - just 13! - but still a lovely sunny spring day for my cycle in to work.

It was great to have an email from a colleague who 'in his spare time' has last week been hitting the headlines by trying to make a citizens arrest of a Saudi general who's here at the invitation of HMG. 

Boris helped give the story legs, by flustering and apologising to the Saudis because May is about to visit to sell them more arms. Which are being used to kill Yemenis in increasing numbers. Which is why my colleague is trying to bring the world's attention to it all. And why he is also waiting trial for breaking and entering a UK airbase (trying to prevent UK planes being flown to Yemen to drop bombs). 

Honestly quite often I feel I am not worthy to work alongside these people. So glad that while we were stuck in unproductive meetings all week Sam has been doing the real thing.

Day 34 - the moors

The North York Moors, to be precise. And Levisham moor to be more precise. And Skelton Tower to be particularly precise. 

We broke our journey from Scotland at Pickering to say hi to mum and dad and to elongate our holiday as much as we could. So glad we did, because in 24hours we fitted in a sunset chat in the garden, fish and chips for supper, a fab yomp up the hills on Levisham moor and a return via Skelton Tower in the spring sunshine, a perfect pub lunch on Levisham green in the hot sun, and a mooch around a much expanded carboot sale on our way out of Pickering.

It's so good to get out to the countryside. I don't think I could cope in London if I didn't have these regular escapes. And so I am thankful I have the resources to do this.  

And turn 180 degrees for the view below...